Emily, it's your life and you can't live it twice

I traveled into Seoul yesterday for something to do. I'm European but I'm currently living in South Korea, and Seoul is about an hour away. I've only lived here for one month exactly, but I'm not having a great time honestly and don't plan on staying for long. In 2020 I lived in Japan, and although things were difficult because of a certain pandemic and all of the uncertainty that came with that, I mostly really enjoyed it. I had planned to do something else after but it fell through, and I wanted to go back to Japan but the borders were closed so I decided to come to Korea instead even though I'd never been here before. And really that was a mistake. It shares just enough similarities with Japan to make me upset that I'm not there instead, but it's different enough to give me culture shock. And there's just not enough positives here to make me want to emotionally work through it, I'd rather just bounce and accept that Korea is not for me. Japan caters to my interests more (Disney, Studio Ghibli, Moomins, J-fashion, stationary and art supplies, Japan just has it all for me!), I vibe better with Japanese customs, it has a better work life balance, and my IBD is absolutely not having a fun time with the Korean diet. I'm obviously aware of the history and I'm not trying to pit the countries against each other or say one is definitively better than the other, but for me and my own experiences.

Seoul may not be as fun as Tokyo, but it still gives me something to do and I really wanted to get a pair of Doc Marten mary janes which are cheaper in Korea than I've ever seen anywhere else. Which is absolutely crazy to me considering I used to live in the UK where DMs are from and based yet are more expensive there. And it's not small beans either, we're talking like a £50 price drop. So I traveled to Myeong-dong and had a 'treat yourself' kind of day.

One of my favorite stores in Seoul is Kyobo Bookstore in Gwanghwamun, so that's where I started. This store has both of my loves combined - stationary and books. It has a really good selection of foreign books too - there's a large display of Japanese magazines and mooks, and a respectable collection of English language novels that aren't too expensive.

I got a bit emotional seeing one of my favorite books on display. I really wanted to buy it, but I had to stop myself as I don't want to fill up my suitcases unnecessarily. They also had the sequel which was wild to me as I couldn't even find that in a bookstore back home and had to resort to Amazon.

There's also a stationary store at the back called Hot Tracks where you can buy a lot of fun stickers and other Japanese imported goods. I bought a Pompompurin phone case which I've had my eye on for a while, but they never have anything for an iPhone 13 Pro. I decided to take a risk and try the 14 Pro case, and it fits! The camera cut out is slightly too large, but it's barely noticeable. I got Pompompurin as he's my favorite of the Sanrio crew, but I unexpectedly really like how his yellow compliments my green iPhone. They have so many awesome phone cases here, but as you could probably guess they're mostly for Samsung which kind of sucks to be me. There's an Alice in Wonderland case where the back opens into a compact 🥺 I would give anything.

I got one of these Pokemon blind boxes hoping for Oshawott who is my favorite and never featured in anything, but obviously I got the ugliest Pokemon and I'm still mad about it so no photos.

Afterwards I walked to Myeong-dong, and stopped on the way to get an iced drink from Baskin Robbins because I guess I wasn't cold enough in -10°c. I've literally never set foot in a Baskin Robbins anywhere in the world before but they have such cute things here that I was curious, it's far more than just an ice cream shop. I got a Purin Peach Blast which is supposed to be Jigglypuff themed but came in a boring plain cup (I'm not that into Pokemon, I just like anything cute) The best thing about Korea is how much peach flavor stuff there is, it's my favorite and so hard to get anywhere else. This was literally just a peach iced drink with cubes of peach jello inside it. It was nice, but it was also snowing and I've never been so cold in my entire life.

Myeong-dong lit up for the holidays. I have literally never felt less festive in my whole entire life.

Here's everything I bought! I'm not really into Korean fashion personally, but there's a super cheap shopping mall underground on the way to the subway station and it drew me in. I love how all of these socks are gonna look with my new shoes, I want to go back and get some of the other patterns! They cost about 1 USD per pair, so I may as well. I also got some leg warmers as I keep seeing girls wearing them on TikTok over thick wool tights and it looks so cute, and the vest and skirt were a spontaneous buy from one of those cheap stalls but I'm literally obsessed.

My Pompompurin phone case. The big one on the back is a pop socket! You can see the camera cutout is slightly too big, but otherwise it looks alright for being on the wrong phone.

And here's what I wore. It was literally -10°c and my big winter coat doesn't fit big skirts underneath without weird bunching issues, so I opted for layers instead and my new dress I bought from M&S before I left the UK and hadn't had a chance to wear yet. M&S is generally where your mum shops, but I thought this dress was really cute with the shooting star pattern and chiffon tiers. And I love how it matches my boots!

People are connecting, don't know what to say, I'm good at protecting what they want to take

I'm not really sure where to begin or what to say, but I've been creeping on a lot of old blogs lately, I'm talking pre-2014, and I miss it. Blogs are so glossy now, if they exist at all. I guess all social media is since the 'influencers' took it over and it started to be driven by money and popularity rather than creativity and weird little niche interests. I miss when blogs were messy and personal and felt like a genuine glimpse into someone's life. When outfit photos were taken in cluttered bedrooms or with a mirror selfie, and we said whatever was on our minds without having to turn it into an advice column or give some kind of thesis like we're writing an article for the New York Times or some shit. More zine energy - although even those are glossy now, professionally printed and bound instead of through a photocopier and pieced together with a stapler that doesn't quite fit. I just miss when everything felt personal and tangible and I want to try and shed my self consciousness and recreate that. Which will be hard, as I am a chronic perfectionist and over thinker and instantly panic when I share anything remotely vulnerable, but I never used to be like this. Blogging and sharing the mundane details of my day to day used to be my favorite hobby and I'd like to get it back.

I think part of the issue is the internet is so much more judgemental than it used to be, and so everything has become so surface level because any degree of earnestness is scorned if it can't be used for clout. And honestly I think that's sad. I want to break down these walls that I've built and learn to be weird and free. I worry about annoying people with the things I'm passionate about, or I fear their judgement, and ultimately it becomes much easier to water myself down. Maybe there's not a whole lot of point to starting a blog in 2022, but it's a way of taking control of my identity once again, and allowing myself the freedom to be 100% myself whilst I learn to be kinder to myself and care a whole lot less.

So let's be friends!