People are connecting, don't know what to say, I'm good at protecting what they want to take

I'm not really sure where to begin or what to say, but I've been creeping on a lot of old blogs lately, I'm talking pre-2014, and I miss it. Blogs are so glossy now, if they exist at all. I guess all social media is since the 'influencers' took it over and it started to be driven by money and popularity rather than creativity and weird little niche interests. I miss when blogs were messy and personal and felt like a genuine glimpse into someone's life. When outfit photos were taken in cluttered bedrooms or with a mirror selfie, and we said whatever was on our minds without having to turn it into an advice column or give some kind of thesis like we're writing an article for the New York Times or some shit. More zine energy - although even those are glossy now, professionally printed and bound instead of through a photocopier and pieced together with a stapler that doesn't quite fit. I just miss when everything felt personal and tangible and I want to try and shed my self consciousness and recreate that. Which will be hard, as I am a chronic perfectionist and over thinker and instantly panic when I share anything remotely vulnerable, but I never used to be like this. Blogging and sharing the mundane details of my day to day used to be my favorite hobby and I'd like to get it back.

I think part of the issue is the internet is so much more judgemental than it used to be, and so everything has become so surface level because any degree of earnestness is scorned if it can't be used for clout. And honestly I think that's sad. I want to break down these walls that I've built and learn to be weird and free. I worry about annoying people with the things I'm passionate about, or I fear their judgement, and ultimately it becomes much easier to water myself down. Maybe there's not a whole lot of point to starting a blog in 2022, but it's a way of taking control of my identity once again, and allowing myself the freedom to be 100% myself whilst I learn to be kinder to myself and care a whole lot less.

So let's be friends!